This Mother’s Life in Lockdown 

Lucie Unsworth

May 2021

Early on in the pandemic, my sister referred to ‘riding the coronacoaster’ and that pretty much sums up my experience of the past 18 months: Real highs, crashing lows, occasional thrills, sanguine anticipation and a fair few ‘is it over yets?’ 

As a control freak whose anxiety reaches its peak in the unknown and unfamiliar, a global pandemic represented my personal… whatever the opposite of a comfort-zone is… a discomfort zone? angst zone? distress zone? As weeks turned into months, and my parallel roles of partner, mother, full time worker, daughter and friend all collided and were joined by a new one – which it quickly turned out I was woefully unqualified for – teacher – I realised my usual coping strategies were no longer cutting it and my way of managing stress and life needed a significant paradigm shift.

Watching the impact of Covid-19 on friends, family, neighbours and people across the world was saddening, shocking and sobering. At times, I found my day to day reality difficult to manage and challenging to process but every day I was aware of those who were affected so much more than me and in so many worse ways and I took the time to reflect on this, being grateful for what I have and trying to do small things to help others where I could. 

I also made some important personal discoveries along the way. I realised that ‘good enough’ really is just that. It’s not possible to give everything 100% when you’re doing 10 things at once, and that’s fine. I learned to triage my tasks and prioritise what matters – that meant that some days my work To Do list got longer rather than shorter and the kids didn’t complete every single lesson they were set. But as long as we were all still smiling at the end of the day, I took that as a win. I learned that accepting I can’t control everything in my life is not only ok, but is actually quite liberating and exciting, and can open doors to opportunities and adventures you hadn’t even considered. Finally, I learned that being in nature and the outdoors (even if that’s just my own garden) is my personal panacea and I need to make time for that every single day. 

And so, despite a few steep drops along the way, I think I have emerged from the utter weirdness of 2020 slightly shaken but infinitely more grateful and with a happier and healthier outlook on life. I have just finished my training to be a volunteer in the vaccination roll out programme and hope to play a small part in the post Covid recovery. So here’s to the future, the NHS and the vaccines… And here’s to being kind to ourselves, embracing the things that are out of our control and realising that sometimes ‘good enough’ really is…